Today is this man's birthday.
If you know me, you know I love birthdays. Probably more than an adult should. I love presents and cake and celebrations.
I also love this man.
But. He does not love birthdays. He doesn't want any gifts or balloons or streamers. I finally dragged out of him what he would like for a special birthday dinner (beef bourguignon) and cake (yellow cake with chocolate icing, of course!) I HAD to get him a gift, but don't worry, it's small and simple. I won't even put a ribbon on the gift bag.
Mike's birthday has been a lesson in loving him well. Because that's just it. I'm a gifts person. A celebration person.
But, stay with me, this is revolutionary: Mike's birthday is not about me.
So I am learning to love him in the way he needs to be loved. The way he feels it the most deeply. I will write words of affirmation* in his birthday card, and I will speak my celebrations of him, instead of wrapping them in pretty paper.
I will put aside my party hat for him. It messes my hair up anyway.
*In case you couldn't tell, we got have four copies of Gary Chapman's book "The Five Love Languages" on our bookshelf. I'm hardcore gifts, he's definitely words of affirmation. If you haven't read it, I highly recommend it. It's a really enlightening study of how to love and be loved!